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8/22/2020

Kettlebell 5k Challenge

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The 5,000 Kettlebell Swings Challenge

This challenge is inspired by Dan John’s 10k Swings Challenge. I’ve attempted the challenge several times over the years and never finished for a number of reasons. The workouts took too long, the volume was too much for my hands, or I just got extremely bored and wasn’t seeing results I wanted. This plan is for the intermediate to advanced strength training enthusiast with a solid mastery of the single-arm kb swing.

What and How

Intention: The Kb 5k is meant to be a more approachable, organized and concise version of the legendary challenge by Coach John. Is it as hardcore? Not by half. Is it as effective as ten thousand swings? I don’t know, I never made it that far. But I believe this plan is still challenging enough to improve body composition and athleticism, while only taking 40 minutes per workout, five days per week. If consistency is king, then a ‘meager’ one-thousand swings each week for five weeks will still kick-start a ‘what the hell’ effect in body composition and performance gains.

Execution: The 5k consists of five weeks, each with five to six workout days. Each workout is time-based, so it shouldn’t take more than 30-40 minutes to complete a session. The only gear you’ll Need is a single, swinging-weight kb. If you have it, you’ll get your money’s worth from a pull up bar and dip station as well, maybe a lighter kb or db if you want some options.

The Workouts

Every workout runs the same way:
Warmup- 5:00 (joint circles, dynamic stretching, air squats and hip bridges)
Every 2:00 x 10 rounds- each round you’ll do 20 single-arm swings, paired with 5-10 reps of another strength move. See the spreadsheet for that write up.
Cooldown- 5:00 (foam rolling followed by static stretching)

That’s it! The whole darn thing is just 30 minutes, not accounting for ‘fuck around’ time between sections.

Now, if you really want to get crazy and add some extra strength work you absolutely can. I'd recommend adding heavy lifts twice a week on the "short" workout days, ahead of the swings. Front squat, bench press, weighted chin ups and power cleans or deadlifts are excellent options. Stick with heavy weights and low reps. I really like 2-3-5 reps, add weight, then another 2-3-5 reps as seen in Dan John's Mass Made Simple model (can you tell I'm a fan?).

If you're a calendars and grids person, you can download spreadsheet with the timing format, recommended movements

kettlebell_5k_-_sheet1.pdf
File Size:	35 kb
File Type:	pdf

Download File

Pro Tips

You can use two-handed swings if you prefer, but the single-arm swing provides more for your unilateral strength, develops your abs and lats more and acts as an upper-body isometric pull.
Regardless of which swing you use, YOU MUST MASTER YOUR SWING before attempting this
If you're going to add additional strength work, I would recommend heavy barbell lifts for low reps. I'd also suggest you keep these heavy, technical movements to the "light" swinging days and do the heavy lifting before the swings.
Speaking of light days, I actually really like doing two sets of 50 swings instead of the ten-round emom. It's tougher and faster!
HAND CARE! I can't stress this enough; you need to address the callouses. A bic razor blade, medium grit sandpaper or pumice stone and hand lotion is all you'll need to brand new palms. Carefully shave the hard packed callous, sand down the rough spots and lotion up. Brand new!
Get a coach! If you're unsure if this is right plan for you, or you're interested but aren't confident in your technique or just want someone to keep you on track while you slay these gains, you should hit the Get Started button at the bottom of this page, or reach me via email or on my socials. I'm here to help!

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4/6/2020

RAMEN PLUS

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Send noods!

Noodles, that is. Tasteful noods! RAMEN PLUS takes the cheap and basic and builds a hella good two servings, each with
CALORIE: 360
PROTEIN: 20g
CARB: 30g
FATS: 18g
Here's how to do it-

Gather supplies

Equipment:
Small pot
Mixing spoon or chopsticks

Components:
1 Ramen packet
1 Large egg
2 Tbsp (tablespoons) of peanut butter
1 Can light tuna (you can use any protein you want, see the last two steps for more.)

Boil yer noods.

Make the noodles hot. I won't insult your intelligence by telling you how to make ramen noodles, but I've always just plunked the block in the pot and filled with just enough water to cover them. For the purposes of RAMEN PLUS, this is the suggested method.

Drain then egg.

When the noodles boil for about 2 minutes, drain off about half the water and crack an egg in there.

Scramble and spice.

Add your spice packet if you haven't yet and furiously spin the contents of the pot around until the noodles are even covered and the egg is but a memory. The contents should have a thick, creamy texture now.

The Thiccening

Season to taste.

Measure out your 2 Tbsp of peanut butter if you're calorie conscious. If you don't care about calories, still measure it out because it'll taste better. Mix the PB around until everything is even and smooth, if it starts to get too THICC just add a bit of water to keep it manageable.
At this point, you'll add your additional protein. For this recipe, I calculated in a tin of tuna but you can use whatever. Pulled pork, shredded chicken, ground beef, roasted tofu or just another egg or two are all pretty amazing. Can you tell I've made this a lot?

It's not much to look at, but she's got it where it counts, kid!
Divide the pot into two bowls or save half for later. That's it! You can add soy or chili sauce to your preference. I would recommend spicing the shit out of it so you don't eat it too quick and serving it with a light salad. If you can, add chopped peanuts or green onion (or both!) for an awesome flavor and texture add to this high value meal. YUM!

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10/28/2019

Punch your ticket to the SWOLAR EXPRESS

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What is it?

The Swolar Express is a 10 weeks-long hypertrophy program designed to keep you "on track" during the holiday season.
This GAIN TRAIN runs Nov 4 thru Jan 10 so you're set with workouts, nutrition, accountability and MUSCULAR RESULTS all season!

All aboard the gain train, baby!

Who is it for?

The Swolar Express is right for you when:

You have some experience weight lifting. You know the difference between a front squat and a deadlift and can set up your own bench press.
You usually find yourself feeling lost during the last few months of the year, maybe even disappointed in your progress (or lack thereof) in the gym.
You are able to see and appreciate progress somewhere OTHER than the scale. This is not necessarily a weight loss program. You will build muscle and strength, we'll focus on cutting again next year!

What do I get?

Sneaky peeky of the first week's workouts on TrainHeroic

You get a lot, dude!

Strength and hypertrophy workouts delivered via the TrainHeroic app.
Eating guide and recipes. It's pretty flexible, you'll have room for carbs and even treats (not a lot, but some!)
Every week, I'll give you get an accountability call from D20 Athletics HQ to check in and see what's working, what's coming up and how I can best help you stay motivated!
Private Facebook and MyFitnessPal groups. Make yourself known, share dank memes, track along side other athletes and get that sweet, sweet social support!

What else??

Still not convinced?? Jeez, okay. Well-
Ten weeks of all of the above for a one-time payment of $200. There are only 15 spots available so if you're on the fence, please message me on facebook or email me at superhuman.rf@gmail.com
This isn't the right time for you? No worries, I'll be running another challenge program in January, so keep an eye out in the new year.
SATISFACTION GUARANTEED OR YOUR MONEY BACK! YES REALLY!

Ya okay, let's do this!

Hell yeah! Start with the short app form and we'll be off!
https://forms.gle/TsjkfnowNE1N4pgT9

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Kettlebell 5k Challenge

The 5,000 Kettlebell Swings Challenge

What and How

The Workouts

Pro Tips

RAMEN PLUS

Send noods!

Gather supplies

Boil yer noods.

Drain then egg.

Scramble and spice.

The Thiccening

Season to taste.

Punch your ticket to the SWOLAR EXPRESS

What is it?

Who is it for?

What do I get?

What else??

Ya okay, let's do this!

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